Whether it’s a joke or a cliché, it’s said the fear of public speaking is stronger than the fear of death. Either way, the true part is that most people aren’t relaxed orators when they get up to speak before an audience. And equally true, at one point in their lives most people are called upon to do so.
Every second and fourth Wednesday evenings, the Arrow Lakes Toastmasters Club meets at Selkirk College to practise their skills, ironing out the “ahs” and “ums” from their speech, learning how to give interesting talks while remaining cool as a cucumber.
Toastmasters has always seemed like a good idea to me, because I have sometimes found myself standing in front of a bunch of people who are waiting for me to speak more often than I would like. It’s the stuff nightmares are made of. Generally, I prefer sitting as part of the bunch enjoying an entertaining lecture, but mysteriously there I’ve been, the one standing and trying to speak.
When I showed up for their last meeting of the year, I found six regular members and a guest speaker already seated and ready to go. Punctual and prompt, we rolled through the introductions and in no time at all, we were going over the rules for our talks.
Rules? We needed to remember rules as well as speak? Panic was already creeping in at this point. I learned that speakers were docked a dime for each “um”, “er” or “ah” they let slip, or any unnecessarily long pause. I felt like a babe at a poker game; I began to think I was going to leave with empty pockets. I didn’t even ask about the tax on profanity, sure I couldn’t afford it and worried that I would find out anyway.
Mercifully, I was informed that guests didn’t pay. The first one was free, of course.
Bonus points (not dimes, I noticed) were given for using the word of the day, which was “bobbery,” an old-sound chestnut meaning “disturbance or brawl.” I didn’t get into the bobbery that night, preoccupied with keeping my dimes in my pockets and my thoughts in my head.
In step with the season, the quote of the day was “Christmas is not as much about opening our presents and opening our hearts,” and the topic we were given to speak for two minutes on was a “memorable Christmas.”
Toastmaster Linda Kendall started us off, and a few short minutes and interesting stories later, I was up there in front of a crowd again, wondering what the heck to say. I could hear an enormous 25 cent “um” building in my throat, expressing the sudden blankness of my mind. And then I told a story, a memory of a past holiday. I could feel the heat of a blush rising up my throat to my face, and then it was over. I sat down and it was the next person’s turn. Amazingly, no one, including myself, had died, or even been boring or offensive.
When Darryl Smolik took her turn at the lectern as guest speaker, we were treated to an interesting exploration of communicating with body language. Smolik literally embodied her subject, easily expressing herself using gesture, movement and facial expression. It was a real pleasure to see a seasoned speaker in action, a spur to keep learning how to get there.
With miles to go before sleep that night, I left the Toastmasters to their year-end goodies and celebration, with a resolution to come back for another visit, piggy bank in tow.
